The Stranger’s 2026 Primary Election Endorsements

It’s that time of year again—time for you to get mad at us. The Stranger Election Control Board has weighed hearts against feathers, consulted the oracles, and spoken with the pentagram on the floor of our office, appealing to all gods but reason, to arrive at our conclusions. Dozens sought our favor, most of them fools. Guess who? Washington is what happens when a liberal wishes upon a monkey’s paw. Democrats effectively control all three branches of government, and store the