Foul Frats, Sputtering Scientologists, and Literally Shitty Legal Proceedings

"Don't wanna get arrested? Hop in!"
MONDAY, MARCH 9 This week of foul fraternization, sputtering Scientologists, and literally shitty legal proceedings kicked off with Bill Cosby, who today issued his first public statement since dozens of women reported being sexually assaulted by the comedy legend over the past four decades. The statement came in the form of a short video released by Cosby, accompanied by the written introduction: "Dear fans, I hope you enjoy my wonderful vid