Thank you for paying for this newspaper

Thank you for reading this newspaper.
Double thank you if you plunked down cash at a newsstand, and triple thanks if you fished today’s paper from under the mini-van while trying not to step in that little stream of runoff from your neighbor’s poorly aimed sprinklers. Self-serving, you say? Damn right. Groceries are popular at my house.
Still, thanking you for supporting this newspaper, or any newspaper for that matter, is self-serving for a higher purpose than paycheck preservation.