Frumpy Middle-aged Mom: I wish my dogs would walk nicely on a leash

So, you may have seen people walking down the street with their perfectly trained dogs trotting politely beside them. Even when vicious attack squirrels run up a tree in front of them, these dogs stay on their leash and do not lunge at the squirrel as if they hadn’t been fed for a year.
You may have noticed that my dogs are not among them.
I admit it. My dogs, Buddy and Lil Wayne, are the type who pull incessantly on their leashes until one of them manages to get his entire collar off and