Microsoft Excel vs. Google Sheets: Who wins the spreadsheet battle?

There are only two kinds of people in the world: those who use Microsoft Excel and those who use Google Sheets. Excel loyalists will fight to the death to prove that their preferred spreadsheet platform is infinitely better than the new kid on the block, while Sheets supporters firmly believe that Google's version is worthy to be called the new king of the hill. 
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Of course, it ultimately boils down to the type of job