This 'Smart' Condom Is Like A Fitbit For Your Dick!

Wacky, tacky, and true!!!
The world gets weirder every day -- and here's the latest offering to really blow your mind. The i.Con, a "smart" condom that measures your partner's thrust velocity and the number of calories burned during sex, among other things.
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The description on the product website states:
"Have you ever wondered how many calories you're burning during intercourse? How many thrusts? Speed of your thrusts? The duration of your sessions? Frequ