New year, old you: Some alternative resolutions

Hope you enjoyed the sausage rolls, the tumblers of Baileys and the Lidl five-bird roast while you could, because today marks the start of the annual self-flagellation that is the phenomenon of “New Year, New You”. Touted by magazines, breakfast television and well-meaning friends, we’re supposed to grab ourselves by the shoulders and force ourselves to become the person we know that we really should be – rich, thin, with loads of lovely friends. Last year, in my role as editor of Femin