David Staples: The 16 stages of the dreaded Man Cold

If you’ve been unfortunate enough to be around me in the past three weeks, you’ll know I’m suffering from that most dreaded of all minor health issues, the controversial Man Cold.
After having for years now experienced Man Colds, as well as the even more dreaded Man Flu, I’m here to report the condition is real and it’s backed by science.
By my reckoning, the Man Cold has 16 stages:
1) Dangerous optimism. The patient has gone for many months without a cold, so much