Schukov: An idiot’s guide to the World Cup

Every four years, 374 countries qualify for soccer’s World Cup except Canada because we are too busy watching Coronation Street. Soccer — for the information of those who don’t care — is played on a field that is 12 kilometres long. That’s why a breakaway takes three hours.
The object of the game is to score by driving the ball into the opposing goal. In this respect, it is like hockey without the bloodshed. Since all games end in 0-0, they are decided by a shoot-ou